Why Can't Their Voices Fade

He seeks the moon inside this mordant, hazy night.
Justifiable depression holds me somewhat aloof.
I am desperate to see the other side.

I want to go away from this.
I want to change my name,
Become a new person…

Why can’t their voices fade?
Why do they pound so deeply in my head?
Flooding the field,
Making work impossible.

I wasted so much time on fools and liars.
Hitching a ride on the new power’s bandwagon,
They have no loyalty that makes the transition from role to role.

It’s the season for hunting truth,
But she knows all the best hiding spots.
Inside my heart,
Inside his eyes…

They seek the chaos they need to survive.
To be the hero, they must cast the villain,
An antagonist to play against their protagonist.

I dreamed of flying once,
Now I dream of death
Of slavery
Being wiped from the earth.
I am hunted to extinction.

Irony has become my life.
Irony is getting called out because I pray for my enemies to find joy.

Self-sacrificing, dieing on everyone else’s cross including mine,
I know love and I show love to the least of these.
Can any of them say this of themselves?
Not without photographic evidence.
Compassion is good P.R., right?

They love only the adulation of mindless admirers.
They crave only the aggrandizement of their own egos,
Sycophants to be their audience
To be the friends they lack
Appearance is more important than truth.

Love is a trophy given to them because of their outward beauty,
Graceful movements,
Passionate speeches.

The hot lights beating down upon wax faces,
Will it melt and show the corpse beneath?
Will it crack and show an empty space?

Souls up for rent…

Folly is their works.
Ignorance is their wisdom.
Puppets, automatons…
Searching blindly for the next life to live,
Emotion to feel
Convictions to assume.

Theatre is a breeding ground for mental illness and wanton idiocy.


To be a blank slate to be written upon
To be told what you have to be today only to change it tomorrow,
To lose your sense of self gladly and willingly at the chance of fame…
This is not healthy…
They are blinded by their hunger.

I have risen above their ranks to the world of steady paychecks,
Little recognition,
Saving lives instead of bolstering my own ego.

How did I ever think that was a worthwhile life?
Was I ever fulfilled by their hollow vanity?
Was I ever happy as a pawn in their game?
Was a friendship I ever had before now sincere?

They don’t know me.
They can’t know me.
They don’t have the ability to see beyond themselves.
I know because I lived in that house.

I left the stage to become a completely different person.
A fleshed out character,
Living my life instead of playing at it.

How can those that find such worth in themselves while being so empty,
So false,
So corrupt…
How could they look at me as I have become and feel anything but…
Guilt?
A faint bit of shame?
Joy at seeing the mighty fallen?
An opportunity to spit on the bound lion?

They see in me a reflection,
A mirror held up.
I show them the contorted nature of their selfish, self-involved lives and they show me…
That I was right…
I was right to leave that lifestyle.

Why can’t their voices fade?
Because they aren’t fighting one person, one “crazy bitch”, one renegade actress running from the spotlight…

They are fighting the ticking clock,
The coming tide,
Their own fears,
The whispering Spirit…

“Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me.”

So by cursing me, they are in fact loosing blessing in my life.
It backfires on them.
Amen to that.

Their words did not tear away,
It bound him to me for a time.
The role of the knight defending a lady’s honor appealed to his chivalrous nature.

This has taught me wisdom that they will never know until it is too late.
People love a scandal and the unsatisfied will shoot at any target.
One day it will be their turn,
They will be broken and beaten, made a target by supposed friends.
And well, I guess I will see them in my office.
I’ll just make sure to jack up my prices that day…
Or order shock therapy. :P